I blame her for this! I am so hungover and she did it! She totally bought the booze for us all night and so Jesus only knows how much I had to drink but I was trying to be green and not waste anything that was placed in front of me so I drank it but I didn’t want to.
Alas, I am now in bed. I went out this morning with my friend and that didn’t go so well. It was really hard to see things and talk at the same time. We were sitting next to a little girl (I think it was a girl) and I know the word “retard” came out of my mouth (I also dropped the F bomb a lot) BUT I didn’t know that the kid had Downs Syndrome. THAT is how hungover I am! I also yelled at a tourist. Oops. F him. Retard was in my way.
So anyway, for breakfast I housed a bacon, egg white and cheese on a croissant and an Orangina, some antipasto and Stewart’s Root Beer. I should have gotten a side of bacon but one time I did that and my BFF made me feel bad about myself. At the time I thought that was the best decision I ever made but she ruined it and so I only had a human portion of bacon this morning even though a medicinal portion of bacon is definitely in order. AKA bacon sammich with a side of bacon. What’s wrong with that?
The Farmers Market was not exhilarating today. It’s still in the corner of the flea market, not by the museum. Hungover people are not equipped to handle crowds of idiots. Did you know they make purple cauliflower? They do! I would have enjoyed scallops and football today but I don’t see cooking in my future. Go Giants! Go Jets!
I have apple juice. I should drink it. But I am going to finish my root beer first. A neighbor has been invited to bring me coconut water. I am not holding my breath but I am saying a little prayer.
This hangover is like a kick to the vagina in that it’s debilitating and also hurtful to my soul. I have never been kicked there but this is what I’d imagine. My friend has me cross my vagina from time to time but that’s more figurative. I don’t think I can do such a thing. I wouldn’t even know how to attempt it.
Look at this cute picture!
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